Stuff My Pregnant Wife Says #9 “Watch out babe! Are you ready for wife 2.0”

Enjoy another post about the one liners I hear from my pregnant wife. Remember, this is for real and not fabricated by any means. It’s basically too legit to quit! Go here to read previous Stuff My Pregnant Wife Says post, especially my last one about how my wife informed me that; “you grow a baby in your belly but it’s not in your stomach.”

Less than 48 hours ago, I was explaining to my wife that I am running out of content for my blog on the funny things she says. She laughed and gave a smirk that had “serves you right” all over it. I went to bed that night trying to remember anything she said lately that would fit, but nothing was working. I had no idea that only hours later, my wish would come true. In the morning, I woke up to my wife in full conversation with me. See, she gets up much earlier than me to get ready for work, and to help wake me from my hibernation, she usually takes the liberty of talking to me. Most of time I hear partial phrases and piece the rest together later in the day. I am sure the reason she talks to me while I’m awaking is so she can honestly say; “I already told you that.” Ha. Kidding. I hope…

Anyway, yesterday there was one phrase that caught my attention immediately. She was talking about how it was her last day at work and how crazy it is that she is going to be starting maternity leave after work that day. Since I wasn’t talking or responding at all (because my eyes were still glued shut from sleep). She paused blow drying her hair, left the bathroom and said; “Watch out babe! Are you ready for wife 2.0” Ding! At the same moment laughter and opportunity took front stage in my mind. I realized that this was the randomness I was looking for. I asked her, what she meant by that, and she explained that even though she loved her job and co-workers, she is stoked to be a stay at home mom. I am very fortunate to have a wife that is excited and passionate to be a stay at home mom. She continued to inform me that she is going to be a wife 2.0 now that she has the time and energy to do the things she loves to do at home. It made me laugh that my wife used a tech term to describe her transition to motherhood, wow my geekness has rubbed off on her. I found this old internet joke about a wife 2.0 that I think fits perfectly, you can read the full article here or the excerpt below;

Last year a friend of mine upgraded Girlfriend 6.0 to Wife 1.0, and found that it is memory hungry, leaving very little system resources for other applications. He is only now noticing that wife 1.0 is also spawning Child Processes, which are further consuming valuable resources. No mention of this particular phenomena was included in the product specification, brochures or documentation, although other users have informed him that this is to be expected due to the nature of the application. To add to the dilemma, Wife 1.0 also installs itself in such a way that it is always launched when the system is initialized, where it can monitor ALL other system activity. In so doing he is finding that some applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Beer Bash 2.5, and Pub Night 7.0 are no longer able to run, crashing the system when selected (even though they always worked fine before). When installed, Wife 1.0 automatically attaches undesired plug-ins, such as Mother-in-Law 55.8 and Brother-in-Law Beta 1.5 release. As a consequence, system performance seems to deteriorate with each passing day. Some features he’d like to see in the release of Wife 2.0 are:

• A “Don’t remind me again” button
• An install shield feature that allows wife 2.0 to be installed with the option to de-install at any time without the loss of cache and other system resources.

A new life starts today with my wife 2.0, hopefully my system resources can handle it. Ha

DaddyNoob